Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online
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Product Description

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God''s will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask:

- Can I set limits and still be a loving person?
- What are legitimate boundaries?
- What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries?
- How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money?
- Aren''t boundaries selfish?
- Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries?

Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

Review

Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend have great insights and practical wisdom into the God-given gift of boundaries. As they discuss how to take responsibility for and ownership of our lives, they give hope that we cannot just survive -- but thrive! --Josh McDowell, Author, Author and Speaker

From the Back Cover

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God''s will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: - Can I set limits and still be a loving person? - What are legitimate boundaries? - What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? - How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? - Aren''t boundaries selfish? - Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries? Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

About the Author

Dr. Henry Cloud is an acclaimed leadership expert, psychologist, and New York Times best-selling author with his books selling more than 10 million copies. As a speaker, Dr. Cloud has shared the stage with many business and global leaders and experts, such as Tony Blair, Jack Welch, Condoleezza Rice, Desmond Tutu, Malala Yousafzai, and others. In his leadership consulting practice, Dr. Cloud works with Fortune 500 companies and smaller private businesses alike. He has an extensive executive coaching background and experience as a leadership consultant, devoting the majority of his time working with CEO''s, leadership teams and executives to improve performance, leadership skills, and culture. Dr. Cloud lives in Los Angeles with his wife, Tori, and their two daughters, Olivia and Lucy.



Dr. John Townsend is a respected leadership consultant, psychologist, and New York Times bestselling author. Dr. Townsend is the founder of the Townsend Institute for Leadership and Counseling, and conducts the Townsend Leadership program. He travels extensively for corporate consulting, speaking, and helping develop leaders and their teams.  He and his wife, Barbi, have two sons, Ricky and Benny, and live in Newport Beach, California.

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Customer reviews

4.7 out of 54.7 out of 5
17,518 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

A L G
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Very disappointed.
Reviewed in the United States on June 7, 2018
Getting through even one chapter of this book requires complete agreement with and acceptance of Christianity. It does not merely inform the work, it doesn''t make sense without it. This book is so God preachy that unless you are extremely religious you are unlikely to... See more
Getting through even one chapter of this book requires complete agreement with and acceptance of Christianity. It does not merely inform the work, it doesn''t make sense without it. This book is so God preachy that unless you are extremely religious you are unlikely to find any of this compelling. Very disappointed.
1,339 people found this helpful
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Michael Z
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Too much religious material
Reviewed in the United States on October 1, 2018
This book is presented as a secular self help / self compassion book but it is full of religious material. Not a huge issue but wish it was more clear in the description, be aware before purchasing.
872 people found this helpful
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Candi2400
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Too Religious
Reviewed in the United States on December 2, 2018
This book was too religious and quoted the Bible endlessly. Once Satan was brought it, I just couldn''t read it anymore. Boundaries subject would be interesting, but this was like a Bible quote book. Not helpful and over the top with the religious angle.
540 people found this helpful
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Evan Le
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Helps you set up boundaries with your friends, loved ones, and yourself to create freedom
Reviewed in the United States on December 18, 2017
[Note: although I''m not religious, I still found a ton of value out of this book] Cloud and Townsend do a great job of using boundaries to illustrate why we grew up certain ways. For example, you probably know someone who has a money problem. He spends recklessly... See more
[Note: although I''m not religious, I still found a ton of value out of this book]

Cloud and Townsend do a great job of using boundaries to illustrate why we grew up certain ways. For example, you probably know someone who has a money problem. He spends recklessly and doesn''t really think about the consequences of his actions. This can be traced back to his parents never establishing their own boundaries. They would always bail the son out whenever he ran out of money and tell him to be better next time. They never let him "feel" the consequences. And so he never learned.

There''s so many other brilliant examples of the importance of boundaries and how they affect the people around us.

I learned a lot about myself through the sections that detail boundaries with friends, family, and work. The one that impacted me the most was the section on Boundaries with Myself. I grew up with parents who while loving, also created situations for me where I was not able to feel the consequences, and so I behave in certain ways that I''m trying to fix.

When I was first referred to this book, I wasn''t told this book had a heavy religious undertone (the conflict of setting boundaries and being a good person in the eye of God). I''m not religious, so the biblical references didn''t really matter to me much, but that doesn''t mean I can''t learn from them. The concepts themselves made sense to me and I would recommend this book to anyone who believes they have boundary problems.
537 people found this helpful
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Andy_7575
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Eye-opening book for everyone, in spite of religious overtones.
Reviewed in the United States on June 14, 2018
This book was such an amazing eye-opener for me. At first, I was a little off-put that the lessons are framed through the scope of religion (Christianity) as I am not a member of this faith, but the advice and the selected quotes are so good, and the selected examples so... See more
This book was such an amazing eye-opener for me. At first, I was a little off-put that the lessons are framed through the scope of religion (Christianity) as I am not a member of this faith, but the advice and the selected quotes are so good, and the selected examples so relatable that even a secular humanist like me was able to gain immense benefits.

One of the most audacious, and powerful observations in this book is that for compliant people like myself, feeling guilt and experiencing pushback is a GOOD thing, as it means I''m starting to set limits and take care of my own needs (and not that I''m a rotten, selfish person as other''s and my own judgmental conscious might try to convince me).

The other important concept in this book is the concept that "hurting" someone is different from "harming" them, and that by being compliant and codependent I am harming others as much as myself, all for the sake of avoiding causing short-term "hurt."

These concepts may seem obvious, or objectionable on their face, but for someone who constantly feels powerless, this book is a lifesaver.
310 people found this helpful
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Reviewer
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
This book was recommended to me by a counselor at my church
Reviewed in the United States on October 2, 2017
This book was recommended to me by a counselor at my church. Initially I had a hard time getting into it but I stuck with it and I am so glad that I did! It provides incredible insight into why we behave the way we do, where those habits come from and how to get out of them... See more
This book was recommended to me by a counselor at my church. Initially I had a hard time getting into it but I stuck with it and I am so glad that I did! It provides incredible insight into why we behave the way we do, where those habits come from and how to get out of them if need be. I have tried to start applying the principles to my life and I have to say that the description of how people react to the initial phase of boundary setting has proven to be very accurate. (Hint: If you''ve always been a people pleaser, they are going to have a difficult time with the new you until they get adjusted.) I feel like this is helping me realize that it is ok to say no to certain requests or to certain people who suck the life out of you. I feel more capable of coping with the challenging people in my life now. I was not a doormat before by any means but I have always had the tendency to give until I had little left for my self or my own family. NO MORE!
238 people found this helpful
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APPLEBUNXH
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
You Should Get It
Reviewed in the United States on July 4, 2019
Help set limitations and have healthy relationships with this book. It''s a great book.
118 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Boundries is an Understatement
Reviewed in the United States on October 6, 2015
This book should be called "How to accept who you are, be confident about telling people no, and have confidence in making decisions". This is an excellent book for those looking to understand the reasons behind deep emotional road blocks. I have read this book... See more
This book should be called "How to accept who you are, be confident about telling people no, and have confidence in making decisions". This is an excellent book for those looking to understand the reasons behind deep emotional road blocks. I have read this book twice because it opened so many doors in my mind and lead me towards answers I had been seeking. If you''re not religious it may sound a little to holy at first but by the end of the book you''ll have a much better understanding of god and his teachings. I never saw myself going to church or reading the bible but after reading this book it helped me accept responsibility for my problems and understand how god and his teachings exist for that very reason. Each individual is responsible for the quality of his or her own life. It teaches that by accepting things which may have happened to you aren''t necessarily your fault but are still your responsibility to deal with, get over, and forgive in order to move on a be a whole person is a fundamental part of life. This one of a few books which may really change your life if you''re struggling with being happy and being okay with who you are.
351 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Amazon Customer
2.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
Only If You Are Religious/Christian
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on August 16, 2018
I liked many of the ideas and strategies in this book. However the relentless Bible quoting is a turn off and the religious influence should be made very explicit in the blurb. Also I have found a lot of the advice works if you are dealing with people within normative...See more
I liked many of the ideas and strategies in this book. However the relentless Bible quoting is a turn off and the religious influence should be made very explicit in the blurb. Also I have found a lot of the advice works if you are dealing with people within normative ranges, and not for chronic abusers or those with personality disorders.
83 people found this helpful
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HH
3.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
This is a Christian book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 25, 2019
It does kind of annoy me when books conceal the fact that they are a religious perspective. I don''t understand why they do it, but I expect it''s because people like me buy it without realising! It is an interesting book with lots of good stuff in it but from the marketing I...See more
It does kind of annoy me when books conceal the fact that they are a religious perspective. I don''t understand why they do it, but I expect it''s because people like me buy it without realising! It is an interesting book with lots of good stuff in it but from the marketing I couldn''t tell it was based on teachings in the BIble. The only way I could tell, now I have it, is the fact that ''God'' is mentioned at the end of the blurb. Until you start reading that is.... If you want to know about boundaries from the perspective of a psychotherapist read the book by Anne Katherine which is very good. I would have given this book more stars if I''d have bought it knowing it was from a religious perspective.
49 people found this helpful
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bob the fish
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
so far i really like this book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 24, 2018
so far i really like this book, and that it puts bible numbers etc beside it. and quotes, very helpful. also as a study book, so you learn how to set boundaries, and how to study about God. I could write so much about this book, but its much better to read it. It is a...See more
so far i really like this book, and that it puts bible numbers etc beside it. and quotes, very helpful. also as a study book, so you learn how to set boundaries, and how to study about God. I could write so much about this book, but its much better to read it. It is a practical book, because you have to put it in practise. It will help people who have suffered abuse, have never been taught healthy barriers, not walls. and its a talking point with people. I wish id found it earlier.
24 people found this helpful
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S. Deutrom
5.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
An incredible book of wisdom.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 29, 2017
A book that changed my life. No more need to be said. Words of pure wisdom. Reasonated with me in many aspects of my life. This book opened my eyes to the patterns of behavior that had impacted my life for so many years. Helped me to understand and gain insight into those...See more
A book that changed my life. No more need to be said. Words of pure wisdom. Reasonated with me in many aspects of my life. This book opened my eyes to the patterns of behavior that had impacted my life for so many years. Helped me to understand and gain insight into those around me who had impacted my behavior and also helped me to stop allowing this pattern and the control of others to have a hold over me any more. This book will support those seeking freedom from controlling behaviors in your life.
24 people found this helpful
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Shawne Sanders
1.0 out of 5 starsVerified Purchase
you will have difficulty relating real life situations to this crap.
Reviewed in Canada on March 25, 2018
This is a Christian book. With full page bible quotations and analysis. If you are not familiar with the Bible, you will have difficulty relating real life situations to this crap.
68 people found this helpful
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Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online

Boundaries: When to Say outlet sale Yes, How to outlet sale Say No to Take Control of Your Life online